Last week, on the hottest day of the year, maybe the hottest day known to man, my husband and I packed up the family and headed to the zoo! Had we not already made hotel reservations and had my husband not already taken a vacation day, we probably would not have embarked on this trip on the 102 degree day. Maybe that isn't crazy hot to every one, but where we live, we just don't get too many of those days! All you had to do was stand completely still outside in the shade to work up a sweat. But, it was still a fun trip and we still saw most of the zoo animals...except for the ones that thought they would stay inside where it was cool. We really enjoyed the penguinarium and the arctic circle buildings...where it was air conditioned! After the zoo, we found our hotel and made a beeline for the pool. Well, as quickly as you can after changing four kids and two adults into "baby suits" (as my four year old calls them-love her!). After the pool, there was some hotel room down time. This is where my ponderings began to take root. Not that I've never felt this way before or thought about these things before, but this was when I realized just how at odds I can be with myself. Oh, and a little wisdom from the Beatles never hurt, right?
Let It Be
I'm caught in this crazy web of Teacher Me and Mother Me.
How do I know when to be which?
I am so much of both at once.
We take a family trip to the zoo.
We take in the sights: butterflies, penguins, tigers, polar bears, seals, zebras.
We feed the giraffes with great delight!
Teacher Me asks the kids: what animal was your favorite?
Mom Me says: what was the best part of the zoo today?
So much the same, yet so different, these parts of me.
Teacher Me whispers in my ear: The zoo! The zoo! Write about the zoo!
It's real, authentic, not forced by me!
Mom Me speaks in the other ear: their teachers said to write over the summer.
Here is the perfect topic for both! Have them write a story about the zoo!
Maybe a list off animals? Write the best part? Write about the heat?
Alright, maybe it's a tad forced. It's summer. They don't want to do school stuff;
Not anymore than Teacher Me wants to.
What?
A third voice?
"Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom.
Let it be."
Where did that come from? Lovely...another Me?
Writer Me speaks her mind: Let it be. Let them be.
Let them fill their tanks this summer.
They are reading. [Reader Me rejoices!] They are experiencing.
They will write soon enough.
But how do I feel about it?
How do I bring these Me voices together?
A mixing, blending, meshing of Me parts and pieces?
A co-existing, cohesive me?
Is it possible for them to live happily in a place side by side?
And...is it a place of writing or not?
"Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
There will be an answer.
Let it be."
How fun is this, the pondering. Maybe many of us have extra voices in our heads. I think the straight teacher me won out much of the time, even when our kids were grown. I'm just used to sharing those ideas, like writing after the zoo. I like that last part especially, Robin, the questioning of "How do I bring these Me voices together?" And it is interesting that "Let it be" moved into the mix too. I'm glad you had fun, even on the hot day. We in Denver have had so many-miserable!
ReplyDeleteRobin, I loved all your "voices" speaking and meshing together and yet apart. Adding in the song "Let it be" is the answer to your questions. I especially liked this one: "A mixing, blending, meshing of Me parts and pieces?"
ReplyDeleteWhat an interesting idea to ponder and reflect upon. I enjoyed the format of your reflection.
ReplyDeleteI think the real "Me" in you is made all the better by being a combination of all the Me's you wrote about.
ReplyDeleteLoved your poema and how your parts seem to come together at the end. It is such a balance of parts when we are teachers and mothers. I always remember my mom telling me I was using my teacher voice with my children!
ReplyDeleteLet it be is great advice - for all of us!
Yes, the voices of mother, teacher, reader, writer, all "ebb and flow". What ever is in the moment is just perfect-whisper words of wisdom and let it be...sometimes it's ok to just let it be.
ReplyDeleteLet it be. Hard to do, but sometimes the best advice for all of the 'me's'! Thoughtful reflection!
ReplyDeleteAnd maybe after a month or two with the distance of time they will still write about the zoo or the heat, or the coolness. Love the voices.
ReplyDelete