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Sunday, March 18, 2012

The River

the river runs
deep and dark
full of anger
full of rage

it crashes the rocks
it slams the shore
it batters everything
in it's path

the rain comes swiftly
with the blowing wind
it beats
it retreats - it ends

the calm comes in
spreading
lightly touching
all is soothed

the clouds part slowly
intentionally
distant and then gone
light moves in

the sky begins to glow
it brightens
it shines
it sparkles brilliant blue

the river slows
to a lazy roll
the storm passed
lays dormant

until next time
Slice of Life Writing Challenge - Day 18 - hosted by Ruth and Stacey at Two Writing Teachers.

8 comments:

  1. I love your descriptions! I could totally get the pictures in my head.

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  2. Love your verbs! I could visualize that violent river in the beginning, then the peacefulness of it at the end. Cool!

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  3. I think I'm taking this as a metaphor for something not so good, an argument perhaps, then a soothing with the light of understanding. You may not intend this, but I love that poetry can show much to the reader. Elsie is right, the verbs are good--"crashes the rocks/slams the shore". Thanks!

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  4. The beauty/mystery of water. I can actually see the river and all that surrounds it.

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  5. I liked, "the clouds part slowly, intentionally." I could see them being pulled apart, almost like someone wiped them away.

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  6. "it beats
    it retreats - it ends"

    I agree that your verbs are wonderful, and I especially love the rhythm of these two lines!

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  7. My favorite stanza was:
    the rain comes swiftly
    with the blowing wind
    it beats
    it retreats - it ends
    :)

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  8. I love rivers, I even love the word river - it just flows and melts on your tongue. This was a moving poem.

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